At first, your daughter may balk at the idea of teen coaching. She may say, “I don’t want to talk about my feelings” or most commonly, “I don’t need a therapist!”   

Like many teens, your daughter may have a preconceived idea of life coaching or mistake it for therapy.   The way you approach the topic and the information you provide will influence how your daughter responds to the idea of working with a life coach. When you bring it up, try to catch your daughter when she’s feeling calm and receptive; present coaching in a positive light rather than as a punishment.  It’s helpful to share the facts regarding the differences between coaching and therapy (download the differences here) and the following points: 

• She gets to decide if the coach is a good match.  

The most important factor in the effectiveness of teen coaching is the way your daughter feels toward her coach.  It is essential she feels comfortable, respected, and safe.  While it takes time for a strong bond to form, she should have an overall good feeling at the onset.  For this reason, I offer complementary meet-and-greet sessions.  This brief meeting gives her a chance to get her questions answered but most importantly, get a feel for me before committing to a coaching program.  If she leaves the meet-and-greet still feeling resistant, I recommend meeting another coach or waiting to start coaching.  

• She has agency in the coaching process. 

Effective teen life coaching is collaborative and fluid.  The coach should guide the sessions but not dictate or force what is discussed.  Because teens are in a constant state of change, it is critical the coach understands how to listen, read nonverbal cues, and use her client’s feedback to guide the coaching sessions.   I always encourage my teen clients to tell me what’s working for them and if there is something they would rather talk about or do in their coaching session. This ensures their coaching time is valuable and personalized.

Schedule Your Free 15-Min Discovery Call

• Coaching is not about fixing her. 

A cornerstone of life coaching is the belief that the client is not broken. Unlike most therapy, which aims at fixing problems by exploring patterns and healing trauma, coaching focuses on building a client’s toolbox of skills, strengths, and mindsets so they can reach their goals and create a fulfilling future.  This is incredibly empowering for teen girls!  They want to be seen as competent, resourceful and unbroken, and their teen life coach should approach them as such. My teen coaching sessions are never about fixing my clients, but helping them discover their core strengths and tap into wisdom that moves them  forward.  

• Coaching is sign of strength.

All successful people have a coach. Athletes work with coaches to help improve their skills, strength, and performance. Celebrities hire coaches to help them sharpen their talent and navigate the challenges that come with fame. Successful entrepreneurs have coaches who help them clarify and reach their goals.  You can remind your daughter that working with a coach is a sign that she cares about herself and her future.  It is a sign of courage, confidence, and commitment.  

• Coaching is focused on her future!

In my teen coaching programs, no topic is off limits but the main focus is on creating a happy, fulfilling future.  It’s about leveling up all areas of life.  We will talk through challenges but not dwell on them.  Instead, girls learn HOW to get through challenges and figure things out so they can feel happier, more connected, and ultimately, empowered!